Dad, I got my degree

Hey Dad, guess what?

Your girl got her master's degree

I dreamt of you holding my hand

Walking down the isle with me when I first got into this school

And that morning I thought about it

And I hoped you'd hold my hand again through my defence

And I think you did

I hope you did

I made mum proud and all my sisters

It felt so good

Feeling like their sacrifices were kind of worth it

And they didn't regret sacrificing so much for me

I wish I had woken up with a memory of you

I hope I made you proud that day Even though I don't always

I am sure there is so much about me you'd disagree with

But I hope you'd still love me

And at least be proud about that degree

Can you believe it's one the scariest things I've done?

I never felt so insecure

Writing this, I felt the imposter syndrome

So strongly

But I did that

I got a good grade too

I don't know what happens after death

I've thought many times about joining you

If I could

To just have a chat

To just say the word "dad"

To hear you say "I love you"

I am truly sorry if I've not made you proud

You probably deserve so much better in a daughter

But I love you Dad

I wish I could hug you

Share my excitement with you

I don't know why I'm crying so much

Mum is incredible

My sisters are out of this world

I should be content

I am forever grateful

But I do miss you

I wish I at least had memories to hold me company

I love you Dad.

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